íy0ÁzÀ©˜çyÑg*Z¨Ô®àŠû@Bõ,¢en¥fakerªthe_office‚ªcharactersÜ­Michael Scott®Dwight Schrute«Jim HalpertªPam Beesly«Ryan Howard¬Andy Bernard±Robert California¬Roy Anderson¬Jan Levinson®Stanley Hudson¬Kevin Malone¯Meredith Palmer­Angela Martin®Oscar Martinez­Phyllis Vance¯Toby Flenderson¬Kelly Kapoor­Creed Bratton®Darryl PhilbinªGabe Lewis«Erin HannonªHolly Flax®Nellie Bertram«Clark Green«Pete Miller«Val Johnson«Todd Packer­Charles Miner°Deangelo Vickers¨Ed Truck¦quotesÜ/ÙSEverything I have I owe to this job… this stupid, wonderful, boring, amazing job.Ù)And I feel God in this Chili’s tonight.Ù3I talk a lot, so I’ve learned to tune myself out.Ù>Me think, why waste time say lot word, when few word do trick.ÙOI’m glad Michael’s getting help. He has a lot of issues, and he’s stupid.Ù#Dwight mercy-killed Angela’s cat.Ù4I’m not superstitious, but I am a little stitious.ÙøLook, it doesn’t take a genius to know that every organization thrives when it has two leaders. Go ahead, name a country that doesn’t have two presidents; a boat that sets sail without two captains. Where would Catholicism be without the popes?ÙŒAn office is for not dying. An office is a place to live life to the fullest, to the max, to… an office is a place where dreams come true.ÙKI got six numbers. One more and it would have been a complete phone number.ÙcWould I rather be feared or loved? Easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.Ù¹Guess what, I have flaws. What are they? Oh, I don’t know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I’ll hit somebody with my car. So sue me.Ù/The worst thing about prison was the dementors.ÙJIdentity theft is not a joke, Jim! Millions of families suffer every year.ÙµDo I need to be liked? Absolutely not. I like to be liked. I enjoy being liked. I have to be liked, but it’s not like this compulsive need to be liked, like my need to be praised.ÚI don’t talk trash, I talk smack. They’re totally different. Trash talk is hypothetical, like, 'Your mom is so fat she can eat the internet.' But smack talk is happening like right now. Like 'You’re ugly and I know it for a fact ’cause I got the evidence right there.'ÙMLife is short. Drive fast and leave a sexy corpse. That’s one of my mottos.Ù5I wonder what people like about me. Probably my jugs.Ù6Fool me once, strike one. Fool me twice, strike three.ÙŽSometimes the clothes at Gap Kids are too flashy, so I’m forced to go to the American Girl store and order clothes for large colonial dolls.Ù&Today, smoking is going to save lives.ÙÿIt is not a good time for me to lose my job since I have some pretty big long-term plans in my personal life with Pam that I’d like her parents to be psyched about. So, I am about to do something very bold in this job that I’ve never done before, try.ÙUHow is it possible that in five years, I’ve had two engagements and only one chair?ÙTI guess I’ve been working so hard, I forgot what it’s like to be hardly working.ÙFWho says exactly what they’re thinking? What kind of a game is that?ÙŽI’ve been involved in a number of cults, both a leader and a follower. You have more fun as a follower, but you make more money as a leader.Ù>I am running away from my responsibilities. And it feels good.Ù1We have a gym at home. It’s called the bedroom.ÙEI don’t hate it. I just don’t like it at all and it’s terrible.ÙQThe people here are amazing debaters. I guess you can say they are master-baters.ÙeWhen you’re a kid, you assume your parents are soulmates. My kids are going to be right about that.ÙWAnd I knew exactly what to do. But in a much more real sense, I had no idea what to do.Ù=I find the mystery genre disgusting. I hate being titillated.Ù1I wanted to eat a pig in a blanket, in a blanket.ÙQAs a person who buys a lot of erotic cakes, it’s nice to be represented on one.Ù%Tell him to call me ASAP as possible.ÙdUltimatums are key. Basically, nobody does anything for me anymore unless I threaten to kill myself.Ù